00:20 AM: It's twenty minutes to 12 and I'm to sleep in next 20 min or so. I have a morning shift tomorrow starting at 7:00 AM! I hate shifts, hate it hate it, just hate it!! X-( !!! And I hate Mondays too. Why is weekend of two days every month? And for me it's once in two months. I hate my Job now. Irony is I do love it at times! Times when it requires some cool tech stuff, and thats once in a blue moon. Well it's a mixed bag always, but why do I whine so much! I know the grass is (seems) greener on the other side. But the more it seems more hope I gather and wish from the core of my heart that all this ends like a bad, really bad nightmare and one day I get to do what I like, not what I am forced to do.
And yes ... I had again missed out on something. I thought of calling a sweet friend, who is getting busier by each day (may be turning sour? :-P) and in the turn of various events did not call her. And I wished to talk to her once from last few days! Couldn't I get a little more organised? As another whine of mine has always been why is it that a day has 24 hours, but the fact is a little planning can wrap up work/obligations of more than 24 hours in less than that! Before I get too preachy to myself I would love to end this question in a question now.
Just returned from a sumptuous dinner by a friend, who is to leave for a Foreign land, we Software Engineers call it OnSite! One coveted dream of every Indian SE out there.Best of luck my friend! :-) . I am still so full that I might skip lunch tomorrow. I have given some advice to another friend of mine, felt a little more matured. Hope all I said comes out well in the end and my friend finds some peace in his life. In the last two years life has become so complicated, and I keep on wondering on this matter. How things and situations have changed over time and I found I have changed so little!
Looking back, I have earned two awards at office, for two different things and I feel I can do much more, but this more can only come out if I am doing something that I enjoy doing. Thanks to my manager who nominated me for these awards. I respect you. But then these awards are something different, and what I want to do is something different. There is a storm going on, a war that never ends. And I am getting tired of it. It was not the same before. I used to think, and now I believe that I am a defective piece. I had not liked this work I do in the beginning, I was forced to. Loved it in the middle, and did not take a wise decision, and here I am repenting once again.Damn me... Ho Darn, is all I say now!
Well I have to start another war called ... "trying to sleep"! Good Night, Have a nice week ahead...
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